Somewhat Witty Limericks

There once was a man from Nantucket,
Who was lugging a heavy old bucket,
He heaved, and heaved,
And grieved, and grieved,
And finally said "Oh, fuck it!"

There was was a boy from a land,
And land covered in sand,
Twas even his food!
I don't mean to be rude;
But it really was quite bland.

There was was a lass from Japan,
Who met a young lad named Sam,
But when they went to the shed,
And later to bed,
It turned out she was a man!

There once was a lad named Peter,
Who was quite the odd little eater,
He could only devour
What was organic and sour,
And smelled like a joint of reefer.

There once was a man from Atlanta,
With a gun shaped like a banana
He shot at a ape,
Of formidable shape,
And that's how he killed Santa.